American McGee is a genius, and he’s the man behind Alice: Madness Returns. It’s a game like non other, being filled with horrifying scenery, disgusting level design and scary characters. I mean all of those things as major compliments, as I’m a huge horror fan. I really like the video game, and therefore, I couldn’t help myself from writing a few lists… starting with this one! I’m going to delve back into the game, sort through the characters and count them down in order. Here are the top 10 very best characters of Alice: Madness Returns!
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10. Caterpillar
Whoaaah, what happened to your wise Caterpillar? Stuck in a coccoon, with no wings to fly? I guess it’s what we should expect in a Wonderland stuck in Madness!
While he still gives advice, being as wise as ever, his role in Madness Returns is nothing clever. Yes. I had to rhyme that part, as it’s only fitting, is it not? Anyways, our beloved Caterpillar is a shell of what you’d expect, but he plays an important part in the Oriental Grove. In fact, it’s an awe-inspiring thing how much his presence improves the entire chapter of the Alice: Madness Returns. I found myself constantly enjoying his involvement in the story, and while he doesn’t do much, he adds some seasoning where it’s needed. In turn, he starts off my list of the top 10 Alice: Madness Returns characters!
9. March Hare & Dormouse
You can’t have March Hare without Dormouse, now can you? Don’t even try to pick. Take both of ’em, alright? Now that it’s sorted and you have March Hare in your left hand, and Dormouse in your right hand, let’s me explain my thought process. I just feel like both of these characters are equally as good, and they both have the same amount of time in Alice: Madness Returns. I guess you could say that they compliment each other well, as they are connected by the same chapter. In addition, they each have a level to their own, making for a very good dynamic, one that I appreciate. It’s wacky, it’s crazy, odd and sometimes very weird. But it works, all in all!
8. Queen of Hearts
Queen of Hearts is the one dominating the fleshy pit of a chapter, with disgustingly awesome level design, and a crazy Giant Alice, who stomps on her minions. While she can’t be thanked for the chapter design, I do give her a few points for it, okay? Nevertheless, Queen of Hearts is a very intimidating character, who’s backstory makes her an important part of the story. It’s a dark reminder of what’s happened, but also what’s to come, if Alice doesn’t do anything. This, combined with her dialogue with Alice, makes Queen of Hearts a rather interesting character.
She’s memorable mostly thanks to her distinct appearance, and not personality. It’s as if she’s a shell of her former self, but that makes sense, doesn’t it? When you consider what happens to her in the first game, American McGee’s Alice, the Queen of Hearts is supposed to be a small character. In turn, she plays her part well, but doesn’t do enough to rank any higher. If only we would’ve gotten more of her, right?
7. Mock Turtle
Where do I start with the Mock Turtle? Firstly, he’s surprisingly cute. Secondly, he’s vulnerable. Thirdly, the Mock Turtle represents an innocence that is left behind. In turn, the Mock Turle is a very heartwarming character, one that doesn’t want anything from Alice, but just wishes to have fun! There’s an underlying sense of sadness and joyfulness that makes the character so genuine, as if he’s not supposed to be in THAT version of Wonderland. Therefore, he’s one of the few good guys that really does come across good.
6. Carpenter
I didn’t see it coming, did you? No, not Walrus eating the Oyster Starlets. While that was really horrifying, I’m talking about whether or not you expected Carpenter to be a good character? I certainly didn’t, and I was pleasantly surprised!
Carpenter fills a much-needed role in the underwater chapter, being the one to send you here and there, everywhere! He’s a very poetic character, at least in behavior. He’s also very funny, at least in depiction. It’s what makes him rather memorable, in a game where most characters are heard, and not seen. In turn, I have to give Carpenter’s crazy antics and oddly fitting role a ton of love. It was really good!
5. Executioner
The Executioner is similar to OG horror villains that stalk you relentlessly! When comparing to movies, he’s like Jason Voorhees or Michael Myers. If we’re talking video games, he’s like our beloved Nemesis or Mr.X from Resident Evil. Therefore, The Executioner is very annoying. But, he’s also very fun and challenging. It’s like he adds that extra spice needed to make the game even more horrifying, and it works.
The concept and design are top notch! However, the Executioner has no personality, besides being a raging lunatic trying to kill you. If that’s a trait, then he’s got something going for him. But I feel like his humorous reaction to Giant Alice isn’t good enough to warrant a higher spot on my list. In turn, he grabs the 5th spot on my list of the 10 best characters in Alice:Madness Returns!
4. Mad Hatter
Mad Hatter give us a proper welcome to Wonderland! Maybe I should call it Madland instead? Nevertheless, the beloved Mad Hatter is one of the central characters you come across, and it happens in the Chapter 1. It’s approriately titled “Hatter’s Domain“. In it, you not only meet a very “broken up” Mad Hatter, but you also journey alongside him after you’ve literally put him back together. While it’s brief, we see Mad Hatter here and there; whether it be as a static toy in Chapter 5 or in the train at the end. It’s not enough to rank him higher, but it’s enough to get him the 4th spot on my list of the top 10 characters of Alice: Madness Returns!
3. Angus Bumby
Oh… My… GOD! How didn’t I see THIS plot twist coming? Wasn’t it somewhat obvious? Well, I have to be honest, it wasn’t! That’s the genius of Alice: Madness Returns, as it’s never as easy, or as simple, as it seems… and I genuinelly appreciate that aspect of the video game.
Angus Bumby is the person behind all of it. He’s the main villain. He was using children, taking advantage of young and vulnerable minds, twisting them to his sickening tune. Heck, he even took advantage of Alice’s sister, Lizzie. My jaw-dropped, finding out all of this and more. Thus, I was shocked, disgusted and wanted to see the end of Angus Bumby. We saw it, it just wasn’t enough. We needed to see him being torn limb from limb for what he did to those children. I just can’t believe how dark and twisted he was; the one who looked the most put together of them all!
Bumby Is the Big Bad… A Well-Written One, At That!
When it comes to Angus Bumby’s role in the story, it’s still unclear whether or not he’s even a real person, as the ending plot twist implies it could’ve all been in Alice’s head. Like, the story of the game could’ve been in her head, as we saw her laying on a bed in a mental asylum. But wouldn’t that mean that Alice is using Bumby as a scapegoat? Someone to blame her guilt on to, instead of taking responsibility for killing her own family? Maybe Bumby wasn’t real, and it was Alice who took advantage of Lizzie, and burned down the house? There are just so many questions that make Angus Bumby an interesting character. In turn, I do have high praise for the sicko who wrote this character; he did a marvelous job.
I’m placing Angus Bumby on the 3rd spot on my list, but why’s that? I simply feel like his voice memories, the opening, and the ending give an all-around good look at the character. There’s enough character to make him very distinct and memorable, while being mysterious enough to makes us interested. Thus, he gets the 2nd spot on my list!
2. Cheshire Cat
I’ve always loved cats, you know? Even ones that have an evil grin, just like the mad and lovely Cheshire Cat. His madness is only comparable to his poetic ways, constantly saying things in a weird riddle. It’s as confusing as it’s intriguing, but it’s always effective. In turn, Cheshire Cat is almost like our very own pet, following us around every level of every chapter. Without him, it would feel mighty empty, would it not? One could say that the Cheshire Cat is our only friend in this crazy abstract adventure, and I would wholheartedly agree.
My favorite thing about the Cheshire Cat is his vital role in Alice’s role, and in her sanity. This might just be my personal interpretation of the character, but it seems like the Cheshire Cat is the one keeping Alice on track. It’s like she latched the last piece of herself, a red thread if you will, to her cat Dinah. In Wonderland, the cat is represented by the Cheshire Cat, and therefore she’s able to follow through. It’s like Alice is chasing the cat as much as he is following her. But what makes it special is that it’s all up for interpretation.
The Cheshire Cat is many things, such as snarky, philosophical, puzzling, odd, funny and mad. I’d say that these are all qualities that even real cats have, so I see what they did there, and I appreciate it. I guess not much more needs to be said, right? He’s the first to welcome us back to Wonderland, and he’s the last voice we hear. Our beloved Cheshire Cat is absolutely great! So, he get’s the second spot on my list. Well, well, even on my list the Cheshire Cat is following Alice… well, I’ll be damned!
1. Alice Liddell
Oh, Alice!? Have you gone mad AGAIN!? Maybe you’ve always been crazy? Perhaps you think that you’re not, but you really are? It’s not a problem with me, Alice. I’m quite mad myself! It’s the reason I like your wicked world, twisted sense of humor, and your slicing ‘n dicing ways! I can’t help but like everything that you are, and everything you are not. In turn, I found myself questioning everything, just because of the journey we took together. Oh… well… look at me, the mad man, acting as if I’m talking to Alice right now. I guess I should snap out of this great Wonderland and break down Alice; not like Angus Bumby, though!
Alice Liddell is a character that’s very special. She’s simply unique. It’s like we’re inside of her head playing Alice: Madness Returns. Nothing makes sense; but everything makes sense. It’s very surreal, if you ask me. In turn, Alice is very cold, yet warm. She’s calm, yet angry. There’s an underlying feeling of sadness and despair, but willingness to kill and destroy. Dare I say, it is exactly this reason she comes across so complex. It’s all about reading between the lines of what she’s saying and doing. This leads to many very abstract moment, that make me feel as if I’m just a pawn in her game; one that ends well for me as the player, but badly for her as an actual character in her own story. It’s as if I’m just a figment of her imagination; I love it. 🔪
Alice Is The Queen; Here’s Her Crown
Whatever way you slice it and dice it, Alice is the best character of Alice: Madness Returns. It’s not just about her being the playable character and the one the story centers around, but also about how well her part in it is written. That’s something I praise, and find noteworthy. She’s not just a blank canvas. Quite the opposite, as she’s a complex character with many demons, ghosts, and whatever the hell those flying baby things were! Like, her mind’s a mess, and it’s a mess that’s made interesting because of her. In turn, she grabs the #1 spot on my list of the top 10 best characters of Alice: Madness Returns! 👑
